Sunday, December 20, 2009

Simple pleasures

I am having a hard time lately. I have to admit that I am having a hard time or else I will not be able to fix it and move forward. My ankle is so swollen and painful that I walk with a limp. My semi-regular showers and my backpack have converted me into a human living on the fringe of real society, someone on the outside, someone on the outside looking in. People either stare at me or don't look at me in the eye when I walked past. I wish that they would understand what I am doing...I have to follow my dreams, I just have to.

I have checked out of the hotel again and have hiked my way up to Fort Mason where I am currently staying in a hostel. I have been alone for so long that it is tough for me to be around so many people, especially when I am sharing a room with seven other guys. This must sound silly for someone like me, such the city boy. I stayed away for most of the day after I checked in because I didn't want to talk to them. I thought that if I were to sneak in after they were asleep and then left before they awoke it would be much better. But alas, I was tired and cold and needed to come back so I introduced myself to them. They were all from Korea and for that I was pleased. I don't know why but I felt better knowing that I had some cultural understanding and sensitivity and while I didn't want to explain to them why I was here when they asked me, I did my best to give them as honest of an answer.

For most of the day, I sat in a park on a hill and people watched. It might not seem like a productive way to spend the day, however, one learns a lot when observing life in this manner. I got some food...watched the Niners and the Vikings lose respectively at the pizza parlor on the television, and then made it back to the Fort to hang out for a bit before I called it a night.

Tomorrow, I am getting up early and going back down town and then to the Lower Nob Hill to get the keys to the apartment that I will be staying in for at least the next month. I'm not excited about it, but it's a place to stay for the time being.

Until next time: Happy Kwanzaa everyone!

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